It is that time of year. People believe they are nicer, share stories of goodwill, and perform good deeds for others. Some reflect on the past and make plans to make amends for lapses in judgment, embarrassing displays of candor, and poorly thought-through photo opportunities. Others share their thankfulness. I, too, will share my thankfulness for a year of truly remarkable encounters with some truly thankless individuals. Bear in mind, my thanks lies with the opportunity for interaction (not the individuals), for these encounters provided fodder for my convoluted brand of cynicism. Cheers to opportunities with the following wretchedly thankless individuals:
A ponytailed teenage bitch who sat next to me on a flight, had difficulty understanding airplane personal space etiquette, and refused to engage herself in activities–instead choosing to peer over the shoulder of her seatmate. Part of me wanted to grab her by the ponytail and lasso her to the aft cabin.
A gloveless waiter in a three star restaurant who insisted on walking through the dining room with one hand glued to his back at all times. His quest for white glove service was overshadowed by his sloshing gait and volcanically pimpled face.
A friend who wants to have a baby with her fiance to : 1) get back at the fiance’s teenage daughter for her overwhelming sense of entitlement and center of the universe attitude; and 2) to control the outcome of the child’s life: college education, good job, financial stability, etc. The stupidity of some is sometimes too palpable to discuss.
An incompetent grocery store porter who could barely muster eye contact, let alone an audible response to my coffee location query. While it is a pity that I have to interact with such community trash, this man’s social status dictated a withdrawn and lowly demeanor; however, his listlessness far exceeded expectations.
A socialite who claimed she and her husband (non-scientists I might add) had found the cure to cancer and bottled it up in a facial mist. Even the most gullible granny could see through this. It’s just too bad this socialite couldn’t see its patent idiocy.
A friend whose verbal diarrhea allows her inadequacy as a worker, individual, and human being to truly shine, alleviating those in his wake of potential interactions, befuddlements, and scams. He could truly benefit from the whole “think before you speak” mantra, but he’s too busy talking to listen.
Of course there are many other interactions with thankless individuals that deserve thanks. But spending too much time highlighting experiences with thankless individuals is exhausting and conjures up feelings of instantaneous upchuck. So, I’ll stop while I’m a little queasy, just shy of an onslaught. So, Happy Thanklessgiving to all who have provided material throughout the year.
Categories: Status
The Social Moth 
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